MODESTY EQUALS BALANCE

There are some groups of people who believe they have the only revelation to what is modest and what is not and everyone who does  not adhere to their set rules of outer wear are lost, backslidden, and doomed for eternal punishment. I will not say what or who those groups of people are but many of us already know. So, in a word, in order for us to understand modesty, we must go to the scriptures to see what God has to say to us about the way we should look. First of all, modesty is extremely important to God, although many people might not think that it is. However, much of God's word does not blatantly come right out and say "you cannot wear this or that", but it's left up to the individual to let the Holy Ghost lead and guide him or her on how to present themselves in worship services and the general public. My mind is racing now and I'm trying to get this in as it is after midnight but I have been doing some in-depth study about Christian apparel for several months and I have pretty much discovered the same things on both extremes. Group #1-Those who believe it is an abomination for a woman to wear "female" pants, make up, and jewelry and Group #2 those who believe that women can wear "female" pants, make up, and jewelry in moderation as long as she is not doing so to a degree to incite lust in male counterparts or draw attention to herself. As for group #1, I personally walked in those shoes because of being under a pastor who forced it on the women in the congregation, and because I was taught it was right, biblical, and unchanging, I abided by the rules but deep in my heart, I did not believe neither was I convicted by the Holy Ghost that wearing these things were sinful. However, it was always taught that whatever your pastor teaches, you have to abide by it whether you like it or agree with it or not. I did that up until I changed churches and my new pastor taught with a bit more understanding, love, and gave the Holy Spirit in my life a chance to work to show me what was offensive and what was not. After changing my wardrobe from strictly skirts and dresses down to my ankles and buying some nice earrings and some light colored make up, I felt pretty doggone good about myself. I mean I felt girlish, stylish, and up-to-date. And unless you have seen people dressed like they have no clue of what century we are in, then you know what I mean when I say "up-to-date". But anyway, my female pants were not tight but loose with a long button-up shirt to cover the main parts that it has always been taught that pants reveal (the booty and the split between the legs). My point is there is a way that a Christian woman to wear pants that is a garment made for her and not the kind made for a man (Deut. 22:5) and still be modest, unrevealing, and not looking worldly. Maybe my brain is wired differently but why am I the only one who can see this and other people in my faith and also the hundreds of Youtubers who make videos and other website bloggers, who bash Christian women for wearing "her" pants. The only thing I keep hearing and reading is that pants on women are not feminine and that God hates it? But I heard through the grapevine, that some of the people from Group #1 wear female pants underneath their dresses during cold, cold weather. Hmmm!!! Isn't the same God who sees the pants on a woman worn as her garment outwardly, watching when a woman wears them privately? See, the thing about a bunch of additional rules that are not laid out in scripture but made by man's doctrine and tradition, puts people in a category of being a hypocrite. My blog is not for Christian women who do not wear pants to start wearing them, neither is it for Christian women who wear pants to stop wearing them but I'm only trying to make a point that they can be worn with a long shirt or trench coat or something that covers the private area that most men like to see whether a woman has on pants, a dress, or a skirt. Men advertently look at women's bodies and are generally attracted to curves and in a lot of cases, where a female is built right, it does not matter how big she buys her clothes, her figure and form is somewhat noticeable. On that note, men also get attracted to other things about women besides her shape. Just let me point out that men appreciates modesty in a woman because he feels he can trust her (especially if he is seeking a godly wife) and it also gives him confidence that if a relationship was to surface, she would give him his legal and lawful right to be the head. There are some women who want to dominate and be in control of everything and everybody and that attitude shows up in the way she dresses. I personally believe that a woman should look and act like a woman. There should be not any lesbian/bisexual projections in apparel, hairstyle, tone of voice, mannerisms, and none of that kind of stuff in a true godly, holiness woman. At the same token, a real godly woman desires to be feminine and stay in her female role because she knows it brings honor to her husband (jf she is married) and to her Lord. Single women and those in unhappy marriages do struggle with modesty and it might not be just a thing of trying to attract a man but women want to feel cherished, loved, respected, and nurtured. So where there is a single woman who is seeking the Lord for a husband, have been praying for years (sometimes decades), and is burned out on being the bridesmaid instead of the bride, if she does not have a good support system, then her struggle of loneliness, depression, and growing weary of patiently waiting has the possibility to show up in her "need a man" attire. On the flip side, women in unhappy marriages, particularly Christian women married to unsaved men have a struggle that women married to saved men know nothing about unless they won the victory in winning their unsaved spouse at one time over to the Lord. But in many cases unequally yoked marriages tend to stay that way until there is a death or divorce. Even though there have been a lot of successful women who stayed there and waited until their husband came in to the Lord. But for the most part, a saved woman married to an unsaved man has many battles to fight and those battles will often show up in her appearance. For number one women with unsaved husbands look like single women to ungodly and even godly men. And these men WILL try to hit on her even when she is dressed modestly because to them she appears to be single. I don't know how that works but even when a woman married to an unsaved man wears her wedding band, she still looks vulnerable and special to unmarried men (especially if the husband never goes to church with his wife). There is something about a saved man being his wife's covering and when he is unsaved, she is pretty much uncovered and therefore, the men who are wild on the hunt might mistake her for being single because she does not have the glory of covering from her husband like a saved woman with a saved man does. Unsaved husbands are generally very cruel and disrespectful to their saved wives and if she stays there for many years and tolerate that kind of behavior and verbal abuse, then there will eventually be a breakdown in standards because there has been a breakdown in self esteem and confidence in what she has been believing God for. Women who have suffered at the hands and mouths of unsaved husbands might rebel against the teaching from Group #1 by applying makeup to hide bruises or put on jewelry to make herself feel nice, sweet, and loved since she has been called everything but a child of God by her spouse. Women with unsaved husbands try their best not to wear their situation outside their house but try to look decent even when they don't feel it. But that is something that people from Group #1 don't understand because they think that beauty is only from within. On another note, Christian women who have husbands that were once saved but backslid might go through challenges in maintaining modesty. Just like the other Christian women who has a husband that has never been saved, the wife whose husband backslides makes her in a marriage that is unequally yoked and her appearance might change from how it used to be when she was married to a godly man. The main point is bringing out a lot things that a lot of Youtubers and different bloggers leave out on their videos and websites. They mainly teach and preach modesty, discretion, and respect and I agree with all that but if we see a Christian not doing that then we got to find out what is the underlying causes for the change if they have gone from highly respectable to totally destestable. But on a real note, many of us changed how we dressed because we just absolutely did not believe in all the legalistic doctrines. I will say that there is a balance between being plain and ghost-looking and looking like a harlot. That is why the topic is Modesty equals Balance, meaning God permits us to wear nice, clean clothes that keep us in our own gender roles (not cross-dressing) and he allows us to wear cosmetics and jewelry to enhance our appearance. He does not want us to go overboard and the ones from Group #1 will quote 1 Timothy 2:9 .......braided hair, gold, pearls, costly array......and 1 Peter 3:3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; but if Paul meant for us to take that literally to not braid our hair at all, or wear gold at all, or wear pearls at all, or wear costly array at all, then Peter backed his stance by saying not to plat the hair at all, not to wear gold at all, and.....get a load of this....NOT TO WEAR APPAREL AT ALL!!!! Now how many hairs do we need to split here. These holy and highly reverenced apostles are not prohibiting the wearing of jewelry or clothes but they are saying that godly women should not get so wrapped up in how we look outwardly that we don't focus on the hidden person of the heart which is where our true value comes from. A true godly woman knows how to dress herself. Jewelry and makeup is referenced as pride by Group #1 but at the same token, their teaching is that Christians should be different and separated from the world but behind all that man-made legalism, they STAND OUT and by standing out it makes them proud because they know they look different from the average person who applies a little make up on pimples or who wears small, stud earrings. Their rules are on the other end of the extremes of complete worldliness and they obligate themselves and hold themselves to certain stipulations that even the word of God does not and that is very prideful in my view. We should let all things be done decently and in order and not to offend our brothers and sisters in Christ. Remember, God does care about how we look and he wants that look to be nice, clean, and as a representation of him, not sloppy, unkempt or uncaring, and not dressing in such a way where we STAND OUT and draw attention to ourselves. And by saying standing out, that can be on either extreme of deliberately wanting people to see you or your group and not the Christ in you.